Elias Lindholm 2022-23 Faits saillants

1 Comment

1. RR Lewis 1 an ago

   Hey Elias. Captain oh Captain. You are so good at this hockey stuff! You know who was super cool!? Dougie Hamilton! Is he still cool? I honestly do not know. DO YOU KNOW WHY?! Hooray! I wish the Ryan/Noah/Elias ‘wow aren’t I a good value, super cool with media in happy times and bad times and geeez I know I’m from Svenska, Boston and Spokane but Raleigh sure was temperate….wait, no complaints! I (Elias, Derek, Noah) love living in The Economists’ Fourth Most Livable City on the planet!

   Am I right!? Didn’t think so. If I had a point, it would be very difficult to discern. Ok I grow up on a cattle ranch in this great part of the South Bay Area, California. Yeehaw. BUT THEN. dial up modem sounds ahhhhh KILL ALL THE COWS AND DON’T PLANT NEW ONES! We are the Silicon Valley! Hooray?

   I gotta tell ya Elias. The transition and duality of being a techno-hick were fascinating. I remember when my high school had its first authentic Asian American student. Those stupid cows (oh and they were mean; these are not docile animals that let you train for cross country sans harassment) sustained my family for six generations. Much like Trevor; I is a Lewis. Lewis & Clark. That was the before me, me. I know if we both had dysentery in the 1800s and wagon wheels were being made with little quality control……THOSE ROCKY MOUNTAINS LOOK BIG.

   Shut up (other people) and enjoy Omaha suckers. Enjoy Elko, Nevada suckers we gonna Sierra on over Nevada till we plant some cows, super nerds make our beautiful coastal plot the innovation hub for the entire world and then we will rule everything!

   So I think the honorable Mr. Sitter was like the venerable cattle industry that…..was mean; definitely laid the foundation for me to be this free and neurotic today….but the time has passed. I’d yell out my window to Mountain View and Cupertino to ask how livable MY BELOVED epicenter of everything is……..but it’s not safe.

   Pssshh. When you got money….anyyyywhere is safe. Anywhere is high class living. I TOLD JOHNNY. This ain’t about your record either Johnny. You are a sad man and you sought a market where high school running backs from out of state would be more recognizable. YOU AINT SHY and this ain’t about what Johnny’s wife wants for you.

   Too far. If things were ever on rails; I sense —— opt out. Quit while behind.

   Highlight compilations from our lovely social media team. It’s a nice gesture. But guys like you and me….especially you….it’s arggghh.

   When I see Elias play the hockey or wear the beanie or make my stomach get all messed up in exit interview soundbites…..it’s like when I see Anna Kendrick. So pretty, so humble, so confident BUT MAYBE IM BREAKING UP WITH YOU! Noooooo Anna! I wasn’t mean! Vienna, Sydney and Melbourne do not have hockey teams! Florida has no income tax but if you’ve lived in Raleigh; you know Florida is not all Tkachuky instagrams (Oh and hi Matt. You’re doing super good…..I ain’t mad atcha champ. Go get ‘em. TELL YOUR FRIEND ELIAS TO STAY HERE! Thanks).

   Tyler had a career year right!? Maybe. Have you met the girl he spends time with!! I went to high school with her (if I was a girl and Catholic)!! She’s from the promised land of Silicon Surf Cows and ‘Does he really deserve the Norris’ too! He was a King and she was a Dodger. Eventually though, ya can’t dodge ‘ol Tyler and SUDDENLY you are living in Montreal 🤮

   Sauve-moi de cet enfer!

   In summary. Elias you are a living highlight. There were college courses where I wrote a really great paper…but ultimately didn’t earn credit because of alcohol or priorities. I find myself not reflecting back on those highlight papers. I DID NOT NEED CHANGE. Change happened and stuff….because I….because we….were great.

   Argh. This is why I perform poorly in courtrooms and such.

   PLEASE STAY FOREVER (36-37 whatever. Not binding.).